Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Bachelor Break Take Two

Another week of our smutty mindless show.. here are my thoughts:

Okay.. Did I miss something? I must have missed something. When did we all get this hate on for Vienna? Why did we get this hate on? I LIKE Vienna!! I'll admit, I didn't on the first show, but she has totally grown on me in a she's his type kinda gal.
What a date. What a terrifying date. This is now the only time I'm glad I got to go bowling and to a pool party and whatever other lame ass dates we went on.  I could never bungee jump, ever. Honestly.. it had to have been a turn off for her that she had to hold him while he cried up there. Don't guys have a rule that they have to at least fake being tough and protect the girl?? Watching that was terrible. I wanted to run back to the helicopter and head straight home for her.. yuck.

The girls are making huge mistakes here. Especially Ali. I really like Ali, but her being opinionated and the leader of the gang makes her come across jealous. Very jealous. It happened to me too. I had a lot to say about everything (surprise, surprise). It made for great tv and I got a lot of air time, but I looked sooooo jealous! (In case you forgot, my guy didn't have a job and was an alcoholic. Nothing to be jealous over) Okay, I was a little jealous and I'm sure Ali is too, but not to the extent we all think.  At this point in the game, it's a bruised ego thing rather than a love thing.
I never have really understood this 'If you like her I don't know how you could possibly like me' thing anyway.
The girls are all starting to become really mean to Vienna. She apologized, get over it. She went and got her alone time, get over it. Get off your ass and get your own! It seems to me that Jake is getting pretty fed up as well.

Oh Michelle. You are the greatest duck mouth kisser I have ever seen. Her lips wrapped around his lips that were all jammed in there.. GROSS! It lasted forever too! Couldn't you just read his mind?
'Please, dear Lord, please, I would do anything to have lightening strike us right now so I don't have to kiss her or tell this crazy lady that YES it would be extremely awkward for you to ask to kiss me!!!!'(For some reason I'm reading this in a Forrest Gump accent in my head)
Asking to kiss someone is right up there with writing notes in tiny little printing and reading them out loud. And depending on the situation, it's waaaaaaay worse. Glad she's gone, but I'm going to miss all the cut-aways to her crazy death stare.

How much plastic surgery has Gia had? My serious guess is at least 8 different procedures. Cheeks, lips, nose (oh excuse me, deviated septum), chin, tatooed makeup with extra makeup on top, nose again, lip injection refill and boobs.  Can't forget the hair extensions that have thrown up all over her head.

Check ya later Elizabeth. Boo Ja.

Ella. Boring. So boooooooring. Reminds me of the weird looking, really sweet girl from Jason's season. The one with the son.

Here's the thing - You can't fly a girl's kid to join you on a date and then not give her a rose. You can't ask a girl to jump off a bridge with you and hold your little hand while you cry, and not give her a rose.  This guy has got to get a backbone or we will be watching this show for a very long time. I think next week's the week.

(This is my official Bachelor shot. The one he'd look at to decide our fate at each rose ceremony.  Think I could have sucked it in anymore?)

Ps. 'I'm so proud of you... Cheers!' GROSS!!!!!!

  PPs. Feel free to post your comments whether you agree or disagree! I'd love to hear them!

1 comment:

Gerry and Lesley said...

I LOVE reading your blog!! It totally makes me smile and laugh out loud. You are a great writer and I really enjoy reading your posts, both about being a new mom and The Bachelor. Things really do change as a new mom and it's not until you're there that you realize some of these things. You have a great way of communicating this... thank you!!
PS - Pavel is ADORABLE!!! :)